Thursday, August 14, 2008

shocking news - swimmers shave chests

Well I was planning to take myself off to the land of my ancestors for some competition (see post below) but some things came to my attention by way of my feast-tastic pal, Stanislaw. Here he is:

Almost as handsome as I am, huh? Well, he shared some news with me. In his comment in the last post, he said -and I quote - "you won't even need to shave your chest!" WHAT?!?! Swimmers have to shave their chests?!?!


Why does this bother me so much? Let me share. Those who have been around a while know how proud I am of my exceptional masculinity. Wally T. even called me the "manliest dog on the internets" which I still repeat to myself every night before I go to sleep. Anyway, one of my most masculine traits that I am particularly proud of is my CHEST HAIR! Here a picture where you can see it in all its incredible glory:

Please ignore the mullet - that's why I never let Massah near me with a scissors any more, EVER. Anyway, did you see my chest hair?!?! There are so many manly chest hairs that I cannot even count them! There's probably 5 or maybe 7 of them?! Impressive, huh?! I have given it a lot of thought, but there is just no way I can get rid of those. So with great regret I must say: I respectfully withdraw my offer of assistance to the US Olympic Swim Team. I want to apologize to Michael Phelps especially, because I know he was really counting on the boost I would have provided. But rest assured I'll be cheering him on from my couch in the corn country.

Go USA! You can do it! Even without me there!

Monday, August 11, 2008

China bound?

I'm wondering if the US Olympic Swim Team needs another member...?

I'm ready!

Saturday, August 9, 2008

you won't believe it!

Were you watching TV last night?!?!

I was sitting around, staring at the moving picture box, when what did I see?!

Thousand of chinese men, just like me!!!

I was so proud and happy!

I think I should be over there, though - since I am a little chinese man too! How can I manage that, I wonder...?

Thursday, August 7, 2008

remember me?

Oh my dog - it's been so long since I've blogged! Don't worry, I'm working on creating some drama so I can have something to talk about. And here's an archive picture of me so you don't forget what I look like:

Ack! That was mean! My girl is evil and nasty... showing a picture of me after I was shaved even naked-er than I normally am! Here's a HANDSOME picture of me in my summer shirt:

I'll be back soon, and hopefully I'll get caught up on everyone's blogs/news too!