training update

I have been thinking long and hard about the Petra situation, and I think I am coming to a conclusion. I have a little more thinking to do and then I'll "come clean," so to speak, about what's really bothering me about her. But for now, I need to update everyone on what's going on with my job!



Besides the fact that is what I look like when I get home, I'm working hard. I don't have time to get into everything, so I'll give you the hightlights: 1) I have "manipulated" (as Massah says) my way into getting my very own RUG that my trainees carry around for me whenever we go outside, so that I don't have to sit on the cold, cold grass. I'm very proud of that accomplishment. 2) I have also found that by screaming VERY VERY loudly, I am usually allowed to stop doing whatever we're supposed to be doing (like lying down - I HATE that). Massah says it's because the girls are terrified of my shriek, but I like to think it's because I am so very good training the girls to do my bidding. 3) I no longer have to go outside like the other dogs when we practice "heeling" (I still haven't figured out what they mean by that...) and instead I get to go to a huge gym where people scratch my chin for hours on end. That one was pretty difficult to establish - I had to work hard on my "the blood is freezing in my veins and I can't move at all please help me!!!" face for a long time before they finally caught on to that one. 4) I have taught the trainees to play a form of bitey-face with me that they find immensely amusing. So amusing, in fact, that they would rather do that than make me sit by their side for no apparent reason for hours on end. Woot!

And now on to some not-so-good news: 1) I am known as "The Crack Whore" because I will do ANYTHING for a treat. I do not find that nickname funny or cute in any way whatsoever. 2) The trainees told Massah that I do not behave sometimes. CAN YOU BELIEVE THEY WOULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!?! Jeesh. Just because I get tired at the end of the day and don't want to respond to any kind of command, I get stereotyped as the bad dog. I am offended. And lastly, 3) I am being forced to do things I do not want to do. And all because they offer me treats for doing it. I can not even tell you what I've done - I've "sat" on command, I've "stayed" (granted, for very short periods of time), I've "come" like some kind of robotic machine with no brain of its own... all because they offer me baby carrots. I'm ashamed of myself. But I'll do it again for another baby carrot....

Sigh. I only have two more weeks of work. I can make it.